Birth date: Feb 22, 1938 Death date: Jun 18, 2023
Joan Kathryn Grant Heye passed away on June 18, 2023 in Plano TX surrounded by her family after an heroic struggle against cancer. Beloved wife, Mom to four children, and “Nana” to eleven grandchildren and one great granddaughter, Read Obituary
My Eulogy for Mom, by PJH
My mom taught me a lot of things as I was growing up after I was “all grown up,” too.
I think it started with the feeling of being loved and secure. My earliest, faintest memories are ones of security and a sense of belonging,
the kind of memories you think you have but can’t quite remember the first time and place you had them.
In the end, Mom showed me what it’s like to struggle with grace and perseverance over the course of the last several years, the last 2 weeks,
and finally, in the last 48 hours of her life.
Even with her cognitive challenges, she was well aware of what she was going through and in moments of clarity, told us how she felt about it and
how much she loved us.
Losing a family member has thankfully been a rare event for my immediate family. What Mom demonstrated and what her care demanded of my Dad ... of me and my brothers and my sister ... of our loving, giving spouses these past several weeks was challenging, intimate, and in a privileged way, enlightening.
I am proud to say we rallied for her, and we met the challenge the best we could. And I’d like to think God rewarded her with as gentle a let down as possible there at the finish line.
At the funeral of our good family friend Ted Troy a few years ago,
the priest said people often ask,
‘Where is God, how do I know he exists?’
And the priest said,
‘He exists in all of us. Look at the faces and hear the words of the people around you.’
It occurred to me as I was searching my thoughts for today that in the same way,
my mom lives on in all of us – in some degree, she lives on in each of you – you all knew her – all of you who went out of your way to be with us here today and many others who could not be here.
Mom of course passed down physical traits to her kids and grandkids, but more importantly, she lives on in spirit in everyone she met and influenced during her long, wonderful life.
If you find yourself helping out the little guy, the overlooked, or the unnoticed,
you are reflecting my mom’s spirit.
If you spend the small hours at either end of the day organizing your family’s activities so everything runs smoothly,
you are reflecting my mom’s spirit.
If you show faith – just simple faith – in the face of long odds or a seemingly impossible situation, and in so doing, you discover that you have the inner strength to accept whatever God has in store for you,
you are reflecting my mom’s spirit.
If you travel through life with this faith and trust, and you find at times you are unexpectedly blessed with the most fulfilling outcomes possible,
you are reflecting my Mom’s spirit.
And yes – if you attentively organize, and iron, and clean, and if you have meticulously arranged closets or kitchen drawers,
you, too, may be reflecting my mom’s spirit.
Thank-you everybody for being here to support our family and honor the memory and spirit of Joan Grant Heye.
I love and miss you, Mom.
We are sending our love and we thoughts of peace to all the Heye family. Love always, Mark Lane and Jane Ott Lane
Sending lots of love and prayers to the Heye Family. We are so very sorry for your loss. Love, the Steve Nivin Family
